i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize
