You can't motorboat a personality
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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