O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
