I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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