Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
i now understand why vodka
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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