Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize