Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I did not marry a roomba.
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