Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I just cut my nipple shaving
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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