I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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