Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
