I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
