i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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