I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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