I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
