thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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