I don't usually arrange sex via text message
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize