he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
