That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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