You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Randomize