i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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