so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
