We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
