hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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