whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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