I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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