I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize