Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
