I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
