Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
