So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Say something about gay babies.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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