Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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