She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
