Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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