I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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