Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
