She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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