oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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