I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
