I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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