Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
