Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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