just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
