Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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