I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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