I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
