I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Randomize
