Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
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