I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize