He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
