Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(954): View more from Florida

Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator

Fav 27 1587 4949
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

birth control should be required to get into college

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(317): View more from Indiana

I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.

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(712): View more from Iowa

Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.

(714): View more from California

Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."

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(770): View more from Georgia

She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.

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(708): View more from Illinois

honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month

Fav 1 489 489
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(631): View more from New York

Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are

Fav 1 15 59
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