You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
