i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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